Tag Archives: advice

Is connected the new confused? 

Forget trying to think of answers to any questions or finding out information in books. These days we have a wealth of information literally at our fingertips. This is so amazing, yet every single day when I scroll through my social media I am hit with a heap of artcles telling me what I should and shouldn’t be doing as a parent. 

Are we all expected to raise children that are perfect all the time? They must have manners, be spirited but not cheeky,  have created 6 apps by the age of 7 and be a natural at any sport they attempt.  

All while the parents never yell. Play with them,  but not too much, they must know how to be bored.  Praise them, but not use the phrase ‘good girl or ‘good boy’, this could shame another child or be taken the wrong way? Show them affection, but don’t kiss them on the lips. Someone on the internet might think that’s gross! Both parents are expected to work, but also be available for all school/kinder functions and acivities (that always seem to be held during business hours)…..Oh and don’t forget you must feed them only organic food, be a plastic free household and don’t even think about giving them refined suger (that stuff is pure evil). 

I’ll admit, I read the articles and I do think about them.  So many questions have swirled around in my head. Should I control cry or not?  Is breast really best? How do I restrict screen time? What are all the milestones again? Why are they such picky eaters? Do humidifiers work? Am I a good mum? 

I’ve decided screw it, half of these articles are simply click bait……..No one is perfect and being a parent is overwhelming enough without all these extra ‘guidelines’. 

The truth is every child is different and parenting styles are different. We are all just doing our best to raise happy, healthy, well balanced children.  Sure, read the articles. Be open to new things, but take it with a grain of salt. Don’t let anyone make you feel guilty, especially if you’re a new parent. Do what works for you, your baby and family.  I do 😀 

Rachelle xx 

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Thanks, but no thanks

One of the things you notice when you’re pregnant and have a child is how ready everyone is to hand out little golden nuggets of advice or comments on every little detail. 

Firstly,  when a lady is pregnant we know we are getting bigger,  we know we waddle and we don’t require anyone to provide a running commentary on all that is happening with our bodies.   It’s almost like once you announce your pregnancy all bets are off and your body becomes public property for everyone to talk about or touch.  Some little treats I received when pregnant are below:

* Oh WOW, you’re getting bigger.
* You popped overnight,  now you’re huge.
* I can definitely tell you’re pregnant now (ummm I know because my knickers are cutting off my circulation to my legs)
* You already look so uncomfortable,  just wait it will get worse. 
* Your boobs are enormous compared to normal and so veiny!
* Should you still wear heels while pregnant?  Don’t fall and hurt the baby.
While I completely understand that there is nothing meant by the comments.  A simple ‘you look nice’ or saying nothing at all is probably a better approach.  

Then the time comes, baby is born and it all starts again:

* It’s quite warm, should he/she be wearing those socks?
* Isn’t he walking yet? Shouldn’t he be walking by now.
* Why is her eye swollen? Is that normal?
* I can hear a wheeze have you had that checked out?
* Oh is that how you do it… I wouldn’t do it that way.
*Is it a girl or a boy?- when my daughter was completely dressed in pink.
* I hate those swaddles. Did you know they’re not organic?
* Did you drop your baby? – Comment from a stranger at the doctors when they saw my daughter wearing a hip brace for hip dysplasia??

Again,  I understand most comments or questions come from a good place. However,  sometimes as a new mother you are made to doubt yourself or second guess decisions all because of people’s comments that were not asked for. 

There is no need to make negative comments and hand out unsolicited advice just because someone is pregnant or has a new baby. Just remember that poor lady is probably sleep deprived,  extremely hormonal and feeling vulnerable.  Let’s just all agree keep it positive and simple.  Tell pregnant ladies they are ‘absolutely glowing’ and all new mums need to hear is they have an adorable little baby.

Rachelle xx

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