Ealier this week I was at Baby Bunting with my husband and two kids, picking up a couple of things before we went out to lunch. I saw a young expectant couple, hand in hand picking out all their new things for their beautiful baby. The mother was having the sales woman ring around to see if she could find an (overpriced) onsie in newborn size at another store. She was glowing and rubbing her belly with so much love in her eyes.
She glanced over at us. We were all dressed up, Hudson gave a sweet little wave and Scarlett flashed a smile. The lady smiled and looked at her husband. I could see that she was thinking ‘ohh we will be like them soon, out and about with our well behaved little family.’
I know that this lady was thinking that because around 4 years ago, I was that lady. Picking out new beautiful things for my first bundle of joy. Thinking of a chubby, cooeing little baby staring at me. I always try to be postive, but on this day I was so sleep deprived and we’d had a morning of tantrums. It took all my strength to hold back and not go over and tell her ‘We’re not always like this. Enjoy yourself, go out, watch a movie, sleep…… for gods sake woman put down the onsie and go back to bed!!!
Babies grow into toddlers and toddlers are hard work’.
A few points that I would give my pre baby self:
▫ Your child will not fit into your social life. You need to adjust your life to fit with the babies routine. If you don’t, good luck. I thought my babies would somehow just fit in with me. While they do to a point – they eat lunch and dinner early, require naps and don’t like wandering around the shops or sitting while you have your hair or nails done.
▫ Put the $50 onsie down, you do not need it or those baby Nikes. I know they are cute but your baby will grow out of them so quick, you might as well set fire to the cash right now.
▫ Sleep, not just a little. Spend all day laying around in bed. Once your a mum, this won’t happen…..well maybe if you have gastro, it might. If that’s the case it won’t be pleasant and the rest of the family will probably also have it. You will have to wake up in intervals for cleaning poop or vomit and adding to the huge pile of laundry.
▫Enjoy going to the toilet alone. Once your baby is up and moving they will track you down and find you. Once they’re talking they will follow you for a chat and even declare in the shopping centre ‘my mummy did poo poo’ or ‘my mummy has black jocks’. Charming!
▫Speak to your partner. Parenting is hard work. Always communicate with your partner. Let them know what you need (they’re not mind readers). Things can get heated when both kids are screaming. When one child is having an unreasonable meltdown and the other has experienced a poop explosion, you will be overwhelmed and possibly take it out on your partner. Remember, you’re a team, take it easy on each other.
▫Most of all, don’t take it for granted. Live in all the moments (even the tear your hair out, I wanna curl up and cry ones). They really do grow so quick.
** Also featured on Mama Love Magazine