Thanks, but no thanks

One of the things you notice when you’re pregnant and have a child is how ready everyone is to hand out little golden nuggets of advice or comments on every little detail. 

Firstly,  when a lady is pregnant we know we are getting bigger,  we know we waddle and we don’t require anyone to provide a running commentary on all that is happening with our bodies.   It’s almost like once you announce your pregnancy all bets are off and your body becomes public property for everyone to talk about or touch.  Some little treats I received when pregnant are below:

* Oh WOW, you’re getting bigger.
* You popped overnight,  now you’re huge.
* I can definitely tell you’re pregnant now (ummm I know because my knickers are cutting off my circulation to my legs)
* You already look so uncomfortable,  just wait it will get worse. 
* Your boobs are enormous compared to normal and so veiny!
* Should you still wear heels while pregnant?  Don’t fall and hurt the baby.
While I completely understand that there is nothing meant by the comments.  A simple ‘you look nice’ or saying nothing at all is probably a better approach.  

Then the time comes, baby is born and it all starts again:

* It’s quite warm, should he/she be wearing those socks?
* Isn’t he walking yet? Shouldn’t he be walking by now.
* Why is her eye swollen? Is that normal?
* I can hear a wheeze have you had that checked out?
* Oh is that how you do it… I wouldn’t do it that way.
*Is it a girl or a boy?- when my daughter was completely dressed in pink.
* I hate those swaddles. Did you know they’re not organic?
* Did you drop your baby? – Comment from a stranger at the doctors when they saw my daughter wearing a hip brace for hip dysplasia??

Again,  I understand most comments or questions come from a good place. However,  sometimes as a new mother you are made to doubt yourself or second guess decisions all because of people’s comments that were not asked for. 

There is no need to make negative comments and hand out unsolicited advice just because someone is pregnant or has a new baby. Just remember that poor lady is probably sleep deprived,  extremely hormonal and feeling vulnerable.  Let’s just all agree keep it positive and simple.  Tell pregnant ladies they are ‘absolutely glowing’ and all new mums need to hear is they have an adorable little baby.

Rachelle xx


  1. Some of those are just ignorant though. “Did you drop your baby” is never appropriate, regardless of the injury. How about, if it’s even your business at all, “What happened to the poor dear?”


Leave a Reply to sagelit Cancel reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s